Gringo's Guide to Miami: Post-Hurricane Memories

Tourists don't usually fly in to Miami immediately after a hurricane. They may find themselves caught in a hurricane if they flew in before the storm arrived.

But tourists probably did not get a close look at post-hurricane Miami, where some particularly extraordinary qualities of the citizenry showed themselves. I share these memories to give gringos a clearer understanding of what Miami has to offer.

• About three years ago, a series of hurricanes went through the city, resulting in elimination of all but 18 (so we were told by the media) traffic lights in Miami-Dade County and Broward County (Ft. Lauderdale area). Via radio, everyone was told to treat 4-way intersections where the lights were out as a 4-way stop. That meant that drivers would take turns moving across the intersection.
• Now in Miami, the unspoken but religiously practiced principle in traffic is: After me, you go first. So drivers played chicken, ignoring the wise instructions of traffic coordinators. The result, as you would expect, was a large number of wrecks, fender-benders, etc.
• When the traffic lights were still out of order three days after the hurricane had left, drivers began to figure out that taking turns might be worth a try. At least, it saved them the expense of body work on their vehicles.
• Another delightful quality of Miami was the way the people handled the gasoline shortage. The power outages kept many gas stations from doing business, because they needed electricity to operate their gas pumps. Those stations with generators were flooded (excuse the expression) with drivers, lining up for blocks down the street approaching the gas station.
• Other cities can deal with gas shortages after a bad storm, but in Miami, there is the possibility of gun duels. (I kid you not.) Drivers fighting to access a functioning gas pump would pull their guns on each other. So police officers were present at some stations, just to keep the peace---literally.
• Before the first of two nasty hurricanes that went through Miami, city leaders broadcast the urgent message that people should stock up on water, batteries, nonperishable food. Right after the first hurricane passed through, city leaders announced that free water and food would be given away at a public park. Big mistake. The word "free" uttered out loud in Miami can draw multitudes in nanoseconds. The result was another form of disaster. Crowds packed into the park, long before the food/water distribution was to begin. Then the water supplies never arrived..
• As you can imagine, the crowd was steamed. They had to return a day or so later to get the free water. The city leaders learned their lesson, however. When the second hurricane came through, the free handouts were announced as three days after the hurricane. Moral of the story to Miami: Stock up on supplies for three days. If you don't, it's your problem,not the mayor's.